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give me a reason to believe (in)
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ended
and i guessed that was the end then. when u chose not to reply. sad it had to be on 25th may didnt it? duno wat to say to u. cos i that day i was damn busy with my own stuff i could do without it hanging at the back of my head. seriously affected my mood pls. they always say one only learns how to treasure when they lose sth. i dont need to be treasured. i'm sure u dont need to be too. but it really baffles me how one can take inattention as abandon, how 4 years can not matter, how they can make one feel like shit. i'm over it. trust me. this one i'm damn sure i'm not in the wrong. guess u didnt feel any regret or watever. i just feel used. so i'm only as valuable as how much help i can give? and i really dunno why i'm always the one holding on. the one caring so much. the one who doesnt mind being left alone. u've been good friends while it lasted. nvr said any bad things about ur. always defended ur. perhaps ur can live in comfort with the fact that my door is always open.
first day of hols
ok actually the first day of my holidays effectively start on sunday la. but for the sake of myself i shall just treat it like it started today. experienced the great drag out of bed in the morning at 8am today. great drag. considering i've always slept past 12 every single time i've returned from a camp. went sch for maths make-up. didnt do tutorials (no time), so i went there to screw around and copy answers. was suffering from post-CCAL camp hangover, so was more fan3 chang2 than usual. great to see everyone again. oh suchin started abusing me. according to her, 4 days without swearing and laughing at me must release abit. wow. hahaha. can imagine the trauma i will have to go thru when term reopens. :/ you got atta**** liao la pls behave more thx we are all looking forward to attending ur wedding dinner HAHAHA. i'm chao sleepy now tmr got CLIMB wowowowow sch again zzzzz. and more revelations LOL! ok this one really surprised me. but then we hope it all goes well la. personally i dont like to work for lost causes but i was really driven to work pls or else i wouldnt have bothered trying getting into this in the first place. though working style really abit weird i guess. ah well. i dont like to hinder ppl. but if my hand is forced then :/ lol ok i'm off to call more ppl bye.
come what may - CCAL Camp 2008
back from CCAL camp. DAMN FUN. haha. was totally dreading it on sunday. guess cos i was really tired and all and really needed a break la. but nvr expected this camp to be so refreshing instead. so yah had a really great time. really really a once in a lifetime experience. yah and random meetings with classmates like yiusum and victor really made u feel happy la. haha. woke up in the morning feeling like sai4. felt better along the way to sch chatting with ppl. haha. by the time i reached the ferry almost fine le la. coincidentally ended up beside yiusum on the ferry so had a good looooooong chat with her for the trip to bintan. chat revolved around a few issues la, and basically found out about alot of things which i honestly didnt know was going on. or maybe i knew sth was going on but just couldnt be bothered to find out. perhaps i didnt want to. but i really couldnt see how this could arise really. if u asked me its really quite jokes. oh well. bintan's a really nice place. beaches are nice. water is clearer than that in singapore. resorts look damn good. everything is perfect. besides the fact that we were not going to the resort. went to some campsite called camp ABLE instead. hahaha. first day was relatively boring. basically nth happening until camp out in the evening. where we cooked in the dark and sat around and ate and talked cock. mini bonding session la basically. then next day had wakatobi trail and dragon boating. bashed through jungle while lugging some 30kg gunny sack of mud on a stretcher, navigating with some cool GPS device. hohoho. luckily we nvr get lost. finished one hour earlier sia. hoho. dragon boating was dragon boating without the dragon. cos our grp was small and they only had 4 dragon boats. so we rowed a SAMPAN. ROFLMAO. haha fun nonetheless. sampan is small and light and travels faster than dragon boats. hoho. rowed to some dumb island and rowed back. got everything soaked. zzz.. adventure quest at night was.. disappointing i guess. i was walking half asleep la. then all the stations not marked out properly so we proceeded to star-gaze on the beach instead. the night sky is DAMN NICE. can see all the stars woot impossible to see in singapore. next day was MANGROVE reforestation and rafting. reforestation was epic shit cos we were literally walking through shit. the mud reached ur knees and u had difficulty pulling u r leg out. some ppl got their shoe stuck in mud. and we had to plant the mangrove seedlings elbow deep into the mud so u can imagine how much shit we got into. hahaha. deep shit sia. but fun nonetheless. washed up at some beach. then rafting was epic fail cos we, well, failed to build a raft that worked. haha. but still really fun, especially screwing around with the guys after our 3rd failed attempt. luckily our dear principal mrs. lim got into our canoe during one of the failed attempts to set off. -.- campfire was random. but the bbq dinner before that wasnt. omg damn good food. resort staff bbq-ed while we were only responsible for eating. the chicken wing and satay damn nice la i cleared 3 wings and 6 sticks while queue-ing up for dessert. -.- kena shook violently by yiusum when she saw me. -.- ate with her and victor woooot. today nth much. almost puked and fainted smelling all the damn smelly bags on the ferry. -.- just very thankful for wat has gone on during the camp. favourable weather. no thunderstorms so no floods in campsite. no rain during wakatobi, raining only during intermissions between activities. omg damn good. looong bus rides for us to catch up on slp. and of cos the fantastic grp A3 which really made the time enjoyable. much thanks to xin er, jianghe (who totally reminded me of lixue, though i nvr said it. HAHA), lee he, jasmine, toonwei, hanif, jonloke and grace. the 8 of u were great company. =DD couldnt have pulled through without ur and we were really a great team! and of cos ms samantha wong. couldnt have asked for a better teacher facilitator. =DD believe everyone took sth from the camp. from me, it was like wat lee he said, my impression of alot of ppl changed. guess even my impression of myself. i duno, perhaps i got to know myself better. but guess i saw alot from this camp. there are all kinds of ppl. super to over enthu ones, those who complain alot, over-serious ones, super capable ones etc etc. but i guess they were all genuinely nice ppl, sth i wouldnt have said before. after all i'm the ultimate cynic. and this camp really just took my mind off alot of things la. even though somehow u appeared in my mind now and again. they'll be back eventually. but at least now i've gotten a break. for a short time at least. and guess another reason why this camp was so good was cos the teachers treated us as mature ppl la. previous camps have been some dumb "drill this into u" type of camps whr ppl really dont learn. but talking to us normally, treating us as somewhat equals, really worked. mr. gary ortega was great as well. chao forthcoming and honest in his views. thats wat u respect man. really dont mind helping out at this camp next year. shall see then.. so i'm currently partially sunburned ad quite tired. still gotta so sch tmr man. sianzzz... right now i really want to: talk to you play bball burn all my work. wargh. anw A3 feel free to add me on msn to talk cock. even though i dont usually initiate convos with ppl online, i'm always available if ur need a chat! (((:
OFF
ok just an announcement to the world that i'll be away at camp from 26th to 29th may at bintan. means i will be uncontactable until thur. in the meantime, ur can pray for me! haha! =DD bye bye! will be missing u and u and everyone else! (((:
woooot
oh and i just thought i shld clarify some things. i was fine with it. i'm still fine with it. i nvr had a problem with this. but on other stuff, i did. there is no hate, no dislike, perhaps only very strong disapproval. and i'm really looking forward to spending time with ppl from titong without work hanging at the back of my head. yay!
class camp
back from class camp. everything is intact only that i've become abit redder and i'm really sore all over the place. arms legs and even my ass. haha. not much expectations before the camp. honestly i was treating it as sch hol come 2 days earlier. but anyhows was still really looking forward to it. after all it was going to be 2 days spent with the class without any work weighing on ur mind. but speaking of work, its total irony how i slept at 2am the day of the camp attempting to complete maths assignment (and spectacularly failing in the process). maths tutor tinks we are all geniuses or sth. like. wat the bloody hell. lol anw ropes course was repaired, so we unfortunately had to do it. 30% eventful, 70% boring. the high element circuit was ok i guess, only that my leg was shaking so badly even when i wasnt nervous that i thought i was having spasms. adrenalin rushes -.- many screams. oh suchin the champ laughed on the tight rope. victor and huirong walked across it with relative ease and comfort. zhengjun WALTZED across the swinging rocks. =/ after that we went ri eat lunch (for amazingly, the first time this year). ok then came epic boredom. was belaying nat (who is incidentally, the heaviest guy in class. he is 1.75 me). so half the time i was worrying about whether i would fly up and worried about my father's day too (especially after falling on that dumb log during HE), lol but yah i was saved cos there were ppl anchoring me. victor and nat totally owned the climb. then decided to stay on belaying and it was nicole and yiusum climbing. nicole is comparatively MUUUCCHH lighter. yah ended up no time to do the climb so me and zhengjun were left disappointed. oh wells. off to ubin we went. trek to npcc campsite. set up camp. haha. urs truly cant tie knots for nuts (come to tink of it, the only tink i can do is undo them. LOL.), so i enjoyed using the hammer when setting up the bashas. haha. primitive living. dinner was good. honestly. i tink the girls who cooked did a great job la so a big thanks. =D anw the 5 guys decided to get siao high during dinner. we were doing nth much la, but just damn high. clearing leftovers in pots was especially fun. details shall not be elaborated on. to put it in a nutshell: victor gone mad. HAHAHA. played some asshole daidee, then girls crashed our basha and it turned into truth and more truths. wat to say. rather uneventful. then went for nightwalk, which turned out to be the highlight of the day. basically we walked on the road without torches and any lamps la. so basically night vision and silence. quite meaningful. allows u to tink about alot of stuff. stuff i havent had the time to tink about. time at the beach was good. then the extremely short solo walk along the not very well lit path. thought about my life, family, my screwed up temper, my aims, so many things to tink about. wowowow. victor made the most impactful statement i guess, looking across the sea at his home. oh wells. hols coming le la. after washup, spam crackers, went one of the girls' bashas to chat. talked about sch stuff. quite deep discussion la. then went slp. lol then this morning sai2 gang1 carry alot of duckies for paddling. total disaster. we were basically going around in circles and trying not to get stuck in the same place. =/yah so we ended prematurely due to mass failure so we lugged everything back and washed up. nth much interesting le ba, besides drinking coconut juice upon reaching civilization in ubin, then consuming 2 big glasses of sugarcane juice at changi village, and passion ice blend after sch. sugar rush haha. class camp was fun la. though didnt really change much, but i honestly tink the class is fine. everyone can talk to each other, everyone was willing to work for each other, everyone knows wat shld be done. every class is diff la i guess, maybe we really shldnt compare anything. i like the class as it is, and i guess sometimes forcing things wont do much to help. class camp over. semester over. great time for a review of the year so far. i'm enjoying sch, which makes a very very nice change. i like the ppl in the class, which will probably be why i enjoy sch so much. made frens who are well, more like me i guess. at least i dont have to keep on being mindful of how they look at me. gives me greater freedom to be myself. how unlike before. been realising that i dont really understand myself lately. shits of being an aquarian, eccentric. haha. perhaps other ppl understand me more than i do myself la. thats wat i really tink. everything depends on mood. sometimes i like being left alone, so i dont need to homour anyone, no need to put on any shit, just me and solitude. sometimes i get the idea that i can survive fine on an isloated island alone =/ but then fren's company really matters to me as well, cos life without frens is plain shit boring. then u only want the company of good frens. haha. like to crap and laugh. but dont like to smile. nvr saw the need to. always thought my smile was ugly. but somehow i would return smiles just to patronise ppl. though i do smile when i really mean it. omg so much other shit stuck in my head. sorry too tired to extract them. haha. pick my brain if u want. lol. bye!
神秘嘉宾
林宥嘉的新歌 曲:郑楠 词:陈信延 我踩著梦的阶梯 走进了 一座迷雾森林 谁的心事 被天使窃听 泛起涟漪 时间它帮我设计 下一秒 谁是神秘嘉宾 小心翼翼 揭开了面具 掌声鼓励 谁闯进我的场地 谁让我措手不及 我早就预备的剧情 你却给我一笔 狡猾地 致命地正中我红心 我跟谁变得亲密 谁逐渐离我远去 华丽演出共襄盛举 唯有你的背影 友情客串却留下刻骨铭心的回忆 你按了我的门铃 我终于 从呵欠中苏醒 紧张兮兮 对你说一句 欢迎光临 全场观众都离席 剩下我 还在原地寻觅 耳边听着 谢幕的歌曲 走不出去 谁闯进我的场地 谁让我措手不及 我早就预备的剧情 你却给我一笔 狡猾地 致命地正中我红心 我跟谁变得亲密 谁逐渐离我远去 华丽演出共襄盛举 唯有你的背影 友情客串却留下刻骨铭心的回忆 我搬到谁的隔壁 谁成了我的邻居 鸣谢生命有你参与 笑纳我的邀请 曲终人散却写下不会结束 的结局 this song very niceeeee. yoga really can sing la omgg. haha. anw i really like the last 3 lines of the song cos it totally reminds me of titong. =))) 感觉很温馨。神秘嘉宾还没找到哦。(找到了就不神秘了。)哈哈!
random thoughts
really appreciate the company of friends, especially those really good ones. and it doesnt have to be in a big grp ba, a few would do. sometimes one good friend is really enough. and it amuses me how ppl know what they want, how its important to them, and how they dont want to take action to achieve it. as opposed to doing all the things that wont get u anywhere, why not be more active and strive for it. i mean, if u really want it, it's definitely worth a try regardless of wat happens. after all, its definitely better than not doing anything at all and the chance is gone before u know it. and then again, breathing space is important. sth i've learnt myself is nvr to hold on too tightly, to give everything some space. if u take up all of the available space, there'll be no more space for anything to develop. and i really tink i dont protect myself well enough. its just not ingrained in me to protect myself anw. and i'm exhausted. really really tired.
roasted sunday
seriously damn SHAG now. after 9 and a half hours at STTA, then another 2 hours in sch. hahaha. literally dragged myself out of bed at 6.30am. 9 and a half hours consisted of the same routine. haha. done it for 2 years le. only that this year i brought work in an attempt to do some. yah i did some. lololol. some nia. was making random bets with xiping over winners of matches, and ice was very cold. as usual. then rushed to sch. along the way tan jiahui called me. "eh asshole where are you?" "i on bus la coming liao." then she told me side gate not open. i didnt want to climb, so got off one stop earlier and WALKED from baoguan place to RI side gate to main gate and was late until some sai4. ok thats not the end of story. i was later told that side gate can scan ez-link to get in. wat the shit. so much for walking la. zomg. anw meeting was good. cos i cleared a whole chunk of stuff off my mind when i found that there were to be no more clashes. haha. now survival is in my own hands. dont die at camp can liao. hahahaha. went to stone after meeting. had quite a long chat with jiahui. hahaha. learn alot of new things u noe? interesting interesting hahaha. and shall blog about saturday and sunday like another day. tmr need go sch. haiz....
GG XX BBQ
hi i am here to update my life. i went to watch CO concert ytd. i just came back from hwachong dance night. i woke up at 6am today. i have to wake up at 6.30am tmr. its going onto 12.30 midnight alr. i have to go sch on monday which is vesak day. i'm damn tired. i wanna slp. goodnight byebye.
-YAWN-
omg i'm so damn tireeeeed. been sleeping late/less recently lol and now i cannot stop tinking about sleeping. ok la not that bad morning still ok then afternoon i need to pass this bad phase before becoming awake today. like trying to keep awake during econs tut. then being very fresh in bio make-up. by the time i went j8 after sch i was half asleep while walking. then complete knock-out on the train home. sianz i cant suffer from burnout now cos i'm moving into the most hardcore 3 weeks of the year so far haha. if i feel liddat now wonder how i'm going to survive the 3 weeks. imma fall sick again and die. then oh suchin will be happy. LOLLL. ok touchwood. anw all the best and jiayou to yiusum jiahui victor and suchin for CO concert and xiping for dance night. and omg i just realised i didnt wish mincong LOL SORRY BRO. JIAYOU EVERYONE!
clash-clash
beginning to feel that tad bit of stress alr. somehow all the commitments are starting to clash with each other. not that i'm complaining la, but its really unexpected. believe me i really wanna do a good job in both areas, theres no reason why i cant, but its gonna be real difficult if things continue this way. adjustments adjustments.. wargh, hate them. haiz haiz....
2 more
lol did another week just pass? yah it did. LOL. totally cant even judge whether my life is eventful alr. haha. just doing less and less work liao. ayee. all that excess energy and motivation from the start of the year all gone. i'm busier, and i like it. maybe cos i was too free last time. somehow when u have alot of time u waste it all away and then u start complaining when u have no time. oh wells. sch is good as usual. no longer spending as much time in the library. mondays are spent playing bball after sch. wed has bio SPA, and wed was jiahui's birthday. for the first time in duno how long the first things that came out of my mouth in the morning were nice and pleasant things ("happy birthday!") when i saw her outside mrt station. shld make it a point to be less mean? i tink i've made that a point for a long time no? hahaha. the cake loke bought was DAMN NICE. yah totally nice siaaa but some ppl dont like cheese hmmmm.. thur! "long awaited" day cos SUPPOSED to watch iron man. asked oh suchin last week alr then its "see how" then went to ask other ppl. which is, half the world is broke, the other half either got no time or watch alr. hahahaha. this is wat happens when all the concerts happen at the same time. ok so anw i almost got killed by yiusum for leaking classified information. (but its my brain leaky not my mouth leaky lehhh. hahaha). ended up eating lunch and chatting with victor yiusum jiahui and suchin at S11, with me trying to psycho suchin to watch movie the whole time. while jiahui flatly rejected. yiusum and victor treated lunch! hahaha thanks! fri went velocity with tew and loke (2 amandas lol interesting), to check out tew's non-existent bag, while i take a first hand look at whr zaobao cup finals will be held. lol. uneventful outing culminating in us doing work at macs and complaining about summation. zzzzz.. then nat joined us for dinner at TTSH. lololololololol. oh and did i mention that we changed our math tutor? the world is peaceful again thx to mr. lu who changed math tutorial from snail pace to breakneck speed. u noe like a rollercoaster ride u get damn bored then all of a sudden it changes gear and u feel like puking after the ride. damn it la why cant strike balance one. hahaha. ok i am totally sian shall go slp soon. and we need more investors for wu3 jia1 hui1's album! interested ppl pls contact me thx hahaha. =DD
坚持什么
我曾经答应过自己,不会让自己不想发生的事发生。 对自己的这个承诺,几乎每一次都没实现。 好多东西对我来说就是这样,一开始是那么的璀璨,但最后一切都会化为一片空。 人们常说要坚持。但坚持,始终还是那么难办到的事。 尤其是在你还没放弃时,其他人比你更早放弃。 没什么好说的。美好的事能沦落到尴尬的地步和局面,我也从来不解。但听多了发生在别人身上的故事,已经没有什么会让我惊讶了。这好像都是正常发生的事,而这,才是最讽刺最可笑的事。有时真的不明白人们如何看待“情”和“义”这两个字吧。我想,你们两个,和我,始终是完全不同的人。 而最终,是你们没给我机会。你们先放弃了。 而我,也不知还在坚持什么。或许你们的不屑,算是给我一个解脱吧。
weekend burned
oh did i say that my com is back? got fixed on sat while i was out. spent the whole of sat recovering it. etc etc etc. actually i've been spending half a day doing it today too. sat morning was spent doing BLYC activity at blue cross. totally new experience. details another day. been going crazy over wu3 jia1 hui1's songs along with a certain oh suchin who i tink even crazier than me. the songs are DAMN NICE la. he's very talented. but then sadly like suchin said he probably wont make it very big cos he doesnt have the looks la. but i tink many ppl recognize his talent la so must support! and theres a serious need to start buckling down and do work. unless i shut down for the term 3 weeks early and yah basically give up until june hols before starting for CTs again. oh wells. cant do that can i?
这就是我们的故事
10 jie's video. almost cried when i watched it. then i looked to my right and jiamin was crying. so much memories. so much to let go of. and so much we can actually hold onto. if a picture speaks a thousand words. this video speaks volumes. 10届 <3
十届
第十一届就职过了有差不多一个礼拜了吧。能再次见到大家时感觉真的很温馨。而这也是我第一次这么投入就职典礼的筹备吧。毕竟是副主席了,需要做个榜样,需要帮忙嘉敏,需要负起更大的责任。还记得刚加入九届时,还是个吊儿郎当,凡是做事不放那么多心思的一个人。但在体通,加入了执委一年后,成熟了许多吧。加入十届时,告诉自己开会要认真了,不能像以前一样那么不认真。最终还是做到了吧,成长许多,从大家身上也学了很多很多。 但这一年,我想还是过得实在太快了吧。就这样连眼睛都还没眨就过了。这一年,有十届着一群超棒的死党陪着,一起疯狂,一起快乐,一起为彼此的问题而烦恼,而悲伤。这是最纯的友谊,是我生活中最快乐的时光。而如今,这也成为了最美的回忆。 还记得我曾经说过,就职当天我肯定会哭。最终就职没哭,因为我提早一个月,在研习营接近尾声时忍不住落泪了。那时还真感动吧,因为十届的一切,真的真的触动了我的心。年头想到我们就快卸任了,那时情绪真的超级不稳定。最后还是慢慢接受了这个事实。 哈哈。在这里有几句话想对多大家说: 旭昌:我们的主席!超有经验的,也帮了大家很多忙!真感谢这一年来都他指点,在很多方面帮忙打圆场,不然活动也不会那么成功进行吧。也是个球迷!虽然是支持 Arsenal 的,但因为大家都公认曼联是世界上最成功的球队,我们也没什么争执可言。哈哈!开玩笑啦,Arsenal 在未来五年内肯定会赢到联赛的。 倪帅:副主席!在九届里也不是说很熟吧,呵呵,怎知在十届变得蛮善谈的吧。就像她所说的,因为她是我姐,所以我连续两年都继承了她的职位。哈哈!已经花了半年时间劝她留在新加坡还是无效(ok 啦至少不是肯定会离开。哈哈!)这一年里也在很多方面帮了我许许多多吧。呵呵。超庆幸有你这个姐姐!加油加油! 敏骢:BROTHER! sorry 是秘书。好像是执委历史上第二个男秘书。哈哈。他煮的东西没有一样不好吃。以后你开餐馆我肯定捧你的场ok? 哈哈。凡是做事都最投入,论“全心全意”,它可不逊于任何人哦。在十届里,跟他关系也算是其中最要好的一个吧。所以才称得上是BROTHER嘛! 稀萍:她算是最不可思议的吧。当初十届名单出来时,虽然是和她一起做财政,但实话说那时已经肯定不会跟她很熟啦。出席营管会议时也没跟她讲很多话,十届里她算是最陌生的吧。就像稀萍自己所说的,刚开始看我不爽,觉得我是“精英杂种”(translation: elitist bastard)。一直到就职过后,乒乓擂台赛那一段时间才开始跟她讲比较多话。体育日主委会我正她副,一起合作时才开始更了解彼此吧。哈哈。她真的很能干,很勤劳。到了营管她做营长时,已经真的超欣赏超佩服她了。佩服她的工作能力,跟她合作的经验真的很好,也从她那边学了很多,也变得跟她超健谈。她能达到目标进华初,那时也替她感到很高兴吧,总算有人付出过后得到了应有的回报。好好加油哦你这个大忙人! 漆特:组长真奇特!记得十届开第一次会议时,他从兆龙调组过来,当了旭龙组长。会议结束过后还留下来,和嘉惠姐一起劝他接受这个工作。从来没怀疑过他一定能带领我们一组,而在这一年里,他也足足让我看见,我在做组长时所有的不足。带领我们组得到体育日和研习营冠军呢!他也是一个疯子,别看他外表这么斯文,疯起来比龙卷风还疯!LOL!!!! 嘉敏:唯一一个和我同年,从九届进入十届的人。曾经一段时间经常跟她talk cock, 现在是talk even more cock. 哈哈。朋友之中她也算是其中最经常向我诉苦的一个吧。也不知道她为什么那么相信我所说的话吧。哈哈。但只要能帮到她,我也很高兴啦。(which is 能帮到谁我都高兴)。呵呵。今年你做主席了,要好好加油哦。我会尽力帮你的! 其他人:you are all great in ur own ways! 王冠所带来的欢乐,殷悦的无厘头,晓华high到天堂去的状况,宗骏超爆笑的言语。当然还有最爽快的成庆,还有金铮和哲男两个超聪明的! 会永一直把十届放在我心中。相信,我们会一直保持联络,一直是超要好的朋友吧!对于这个我是超有信心的哦! 十届:一年的光彩,永恒的回忆。你们超级无敌 wonderful 到爆!!
busy!
ok havent been here in 13 years. LOL. ok havent updated in a long time. so many things have happened in this period. but well, been losing the mood to blog. not like i have much time to spare anw. well, wats happened since i last blogged? jiu4 zhi2 rehearsals and of cos jiuzhi itself on sunday. shall devote some other time to write a post on that ba, since rushing thru a post wont do everyone any justice. hmm.. had YC exco interviews on wed. haha. got picked as new vice-pres. very honoured la. and damn happy for jiahui as well! haha congrats congrats new exco lets jiayou! omg la my mind is damn blank. ok la shall random another time bye! |